Friday, October 9, 2009

Come on in!

You see, it is Evans family tradition to have Gus (desert tortoise) in the family pictures.

It was raining.
It was cold.
It was in Springville.

So, we loaded her into the cooler (aka hotel room for the winter) and we were off.
Family pictures went well... I think... and we ended the evening at my sister's house for dinner.

Then, we came home. It was late. We were tired. We unloaded the family and the bags and the mail and the everything and went straight to bed. Monday mornings come too quickly.

All night long we felt this draft. It was really cold. And, the heater kept kicking on. Weird, right?

Well, it would only be weird if there was no reason for it. But, there was a reason.

The front door had been left WIDE open (including the screen door which was propped open)... And, as it turned out, the garage was left open... AND, interestingly enough, the car doors were open... ALL NIGHT LONG.

That's right. In our rush we failed to close the doors to ANYTHING.

It was an open invitation into our home for 8 straight hours. Nice. Luckily, nothing happened... this time.

Friday, September 18, 2009

Brandon is on a bad-80's-movies kick.

I should have known I would be subjected to watch these types of things. I mean, the night of our first date we came back to his place to watch "Powder" -- ya know, the movie with the kid whose mom was struck by lightning and he was magnetic. A few weeks later he rented Edward Scissor Hands (aka the weirdest movie ever made).

Fast-forward to this week:
I made chocolate chip cookies and then took a shower. While I was in there, Boston managed to eat all the cookies while Brandon ran to the video store.

And, what did he come home with?
-The Breakfast Club: simple story line, study dialogue, and sappy/pseudo-emotional ending.
-Howard The Duck: I have managed to avoid seeing this so far.

Anyway, I imagine he will continue to want to watch these movies. So, I am wondering if any of you have any suggestions for our future endeavors. The more ridiculous, the better... Like: Labyrinth.

Suggest away! Or you can just reminisce about your past favorites... this can include TV shows (Mr. Belvedere, Who's the Boss).

Friday, September 11, 2009

Trying to have a baby

It should only take one event: sleep with your husband (or boyfriend or neighbor or stranger).
Yet. For some reason bunches of people cannot make it work and resort to extreme tactics.

Today:
1. I bought 3 single sterile syringes from a pharmacy (at the risk of sounding like a drug user)
2. I got in a fight with an independent pharmacy owner
3. I washed my hands
4. She dropped her pants
5. I injected 3 mL x 3 and 1 mL x 1 in the gluteus maximus
6. I washed my hands
7. I went on my merry way

This is one of many steps taken to cause weight gain, pain, water retention, insomnia, stress and ripping/tearing/dilating/bleeding.

The immediate goal: ovulation
The long-term goal: someone to care about her when she dies (in the next 70 yrs)

I find it amazing that so many women who wish to not get pregnant do and so many who would give up anything to have a baby don't. It may be a heavenly conspiracy to teach both groups a lesson in patience, love and understanding OR maybe it is just a crazy fluke. I am not sure which.

But, what I know for sure is... 10 mL of fluid is too much for this girl's butt. And, if I have things my way, you won't catch me with my pants down.

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

The First of Many Blogs (maybe)

Brandon and I went on a ridiculous "road trip" to Lava Hot Springs. I say "road trip" sarcastically because we didn't ride more than 2 hrs between legs on the trip...

We enjoyed several ridiculous things during our trip:
1. Haken hitting "birdies" under the couch (golf)
2. Shad jumping out of his chair in the restaurant to cheer during a football game. The ladies at the table next to us said that she understood...
3. Going to the liquor store with Heather immediately after a session at the Logan Temple.
4. 500 Days of Summer for the second time in one week-- the ridiculous part is the theater: cash only.
5. Night in a motel with a bullet hole in the window and octogenarians on the porch.
6. Finding it impossible to find a church to attend because LDS.org is simply impossible to use.
7. Lava Hot Springs Main Street = enough said.
8. Seeing Heather naked (ok, ok scantily clad)
9. I assigned our new nicknames and the name of our new blog: Chubbs (Brandon) and Slim (Me)

All-in-all we had a great time.